The Ugly Side of Pretty Pictures

Some people feel that I should show my family on social media. I often feel the same … until I’m reminded of how strangely intrusive (and unnecessarily negative and critical) social media can be. As someone who has spent nearly half of her life in the media, I am relatively comfortable with people discussing me (sometimes in a negative light) on social media and the glare of public scrutiny. However, neither my husband nor our children signed up for this scrutiny and out of respect for them, I try to keep them out of the media as far as I can. Just the other day, I saw a friend post an adorable picture of her son after lunch with his toddler belly out and toothy grin. I “liked” it on Instagram and wanted to post a friendly comment. I was absolutely shocked, though, at a few comments on the post discussing whether the child suffered from malnutrition because of his “bloated stomach” or whether she was doing something wrong as a parent. People who had never met her and who had no idea that she is the most incredible mom who literally cooks every meal from scratch. Honestly, I was amazed that people would use a platform such as this to criticise one’s parenting.

Yes, I enjoy social media and I guiltily enjoy counting my likes and reading comments, and I’m grown up enough to know that you can’t please everyone. I just think that social media and the relative anonymity of a “username” has eroded some of people’s manners. I can handle harsh words from strangers for no particular reason, but don’t want to expose my children to that.

I admit guilt for once angry-tweeting Kim Kardashian when she said that she couldn’t wait to leave Cape Town and she was so ready to go home. The chances that she read my tweet are miniscule, but for some reason, I felt her tweet was offensive and wanted to let her know that. What on earth was I thinking? Did it make me feel better? No? Did I prove something? No? Lesson learnt and I’m sorry, KK.

Why has social media become such a negative place?

Until I figure that out, I’ll continue posting pictures hiding my family’s faces in the most subtle way possible. What are your thoughts on social media? Post below and stand a chance of winning R500 in your bank account – the Modern Mommy team will let you know you’ve won via e-mail. You have to follow @ModernMommyBlog on Instagram to qualify so click here if you’re not following already!

Love and Light,

xx Modern Mommy

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53 Comments

  1. leilanie
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Social media was a great “thing”before people started to put they personal stuff on it for everyone to see.for me it’s a honour and nice to follow celebs photos and like it or comment in a positive matter because I like to look at they pictures. I’m getting angry at people who just want to judge other and say negative things which I think is wrong because they took the chance away from us to like or get to know our celebs better.

  2. Clarissa
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Hi Jo-Ann Hope you are well? Congrats on your Beautiful daughter may she bring you all the Joy in the world. I agree about keeping your children out of the media as many have negative comments. A’ll the best with baby and may God continue to Bless you!! Regards Clarissa

  3. Melissa Kopman
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Social media has become a part of society where anything and everything goes. I have followed
    Jo-Ann for a while on social media because she has always been a pledge role model and when she become a Mom, although I have no kids yet, I admire the way she respects her kids privacy and keeps her kids and family out of the social media light. Social Media is an awesome tool for staying connected with people and marketing businesses but when it comes to your personal, most precious memories, I still fall into the category of keeping them in huge photo albums for family and close friends to see. Although kids don’t understand and don’t read or hear the negative comments posted, why put that out into their universe anyway.

    Thank you Jo-Ann for being an awesome role model in my life. God bless you, and your precious family always.

  4. Precious Pitjeng
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Social media is indeed training us to compare our lives,instead of appreciating everything we are. Our confidence and happiness can be controlled by people we don’t even know and it’s very sad! It all depends on YOU at the end of the day,to choose what you want to post or what not to! People will have opinions but at the end of it all, you’re all you have and accountable for your own actions ☺

  5. Di
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Congratulations on your babay girl! At the end of the day, we as the public need to respect whatever decisions you make about the privacy of your family. You are human beings with feelings and rights just like any other member of the public.

  6. Stacey-Leigh Matthews
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Social media is great……however, nobody knows what’s best for your family except you especially when it comes to being a mom, guardian, helper, provider or even warrior to those precious little beings whom you have created along with god and have vowed to protect them with your life for as long as humanly possible as they cannot defend themselves, so if not showing their faces but still including your followers in those little experiences that you share with your babies is what you feel is best for them then all power to you Jo-Anne i couldn’t agree more, each to their own and people should learn to respect that. As a mom of two exceptional little boys i completely understand and can most definitely relate. Xxxx

  7. Genevieve Swigelaar
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Social media is a place where people feel comfortable to voice their opinions. In that sense, we forget somehow we’re interacting with real people with real feelings. We’re becoming what all great thinkers said we would become when technology takes over. How to change this, is solely up to the individual.

  8. Cindy Jacobs
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    I enjoy reading your blog posts, I feel that everyone on Social Media should share only what they feel they want to or are comfortable with. I also feel that whatever is posted on any social platform should not take offense by responses/comments from others, it’s social media and everyone is entitled to their opinion! If you don’t want people talking about it, don’t post about it!

  9. Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    I believe it’s your choice to keep your family out of social media.There are loads of keyboard warriors who I waiting for an opportunity to lash out at people. Often peoples feelings are hurt from rude & unwanted comments.Especially from people who don’t even know you but are so ever willing to pass judgement. I say to each his own & you do what’s best to protect your little family.

  10. Megan Jonkers
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Hi 🙂 social media is fun and i enjoy it, i’m also a blogger and i know there’s such an ugly side to soical media because people are mean and nasty. You have chosen a career in the public eye and that was your choice. If you feel like you do not want to share pictures of your children on social media that’s your choice and if people have a problem with that it’s their issue not yours. I enjoy your post and pictures. People should get that if you are in the public eye doesn’t mean that your kids have to be. It’s your choice no-one elses.

  11. Julia
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    I love it and I hate it. I love it because it appeals to the introvert in me (I come alive!) and I hate it because it seems to be a place where people think that they can just say what they want to. I keep MY experience as happy and as positive as possible and I only follow those who add to it. I follow accounts and media that interest me. No negativity on my watch!
    I do post pictures of my kids. Only because I am in control of my account. I will not allow rude comments etc. You will be BLOCKED already! And of course, my security settings are set to the MAXIMUM and I check them regularly. As my kids get older they insist that I get their permission and I respect that at all times.

  12. dorianne rudolph
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Social media is a powerful tool when used respectfully in the right hands.

  13. Simoene
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Support you 100%. Your private life is private and people tend to make their personal life public which I cannot handle. Congratulations with the birth of your daughter. May you and your family have a happy life.

    I am 6 months pregnant and I am following your example which was also my mother’s advice. She said Simorne.. keep your private life.. private..

    Kapish!!

  14. Thabisile Zwane
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Congratulations on your birth of your daughters. And that picture it’s so “nunus”.
    Social media got its pros and cons. I myself found part time jobs, the time I was a student through social media. But it is quite unfortunately the misuse of social media and people being mean, very offensive and slandering ones characters.
    I’m guilty of checking my likes as well but I never “sniff” for them by up loading inappropriate pictures. I always look at people’s I.G why they got so many followers, cause they not celebrities nor bloggers. Then I doubted myself if I’m pretty enough to gain followers, I don’t go-to fancy places to post about, Snapchat videos in a car about my favorite jam on the radio cause I don’t own a car. I don’t have a “Blesser” to get me a box of chocolate and a bouquet of followers to post, I sometimes think my life it’s too simple and boring. social media can perpetuate an opulent lifestyle we don’t have. That’s why young girls fall for “Sugar daddies” aka “the blesser”. At the end of the day, its knowing who you are where you from and where are you going. And not comparing our lives.
    I know you gonna be a good mother, and a positive role model to your daughter and you’ll show her, that it’s okay sometimes not to fit. Our life purpose it’s not the same. Once again congratulations

  15. Melissa Morgan
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Social media is a wonderful tool when it comes to keeping up-to-date with the things that are going on around us.

    I love scrolling through Facebook, Instagram and Twitter to get a glimpse into the world of my friends, favourite celebrities, people I went to school with, etc.

    It is admirable the self-restraint you have when it comes to posting photos of your family. In the tech-savvy age that we live in, it is so convenient for us to take a snap and post it online – sometimes not realising the consequences of that action. People can be extremely nosey or cruel behind the facade of the computer screen. Before posting photos with other people (especially children), it is important to get permission.

    Keep up the great work Jo-Ann and congratulations on the newest member of your family. God’s richest blessings to you and your family.

  16. Thabisile Zwane
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    * flowers not followers

  17. Caryn Step
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    There’s a time and place for social media, honestly, some days I briefly scroll past things without giving it too much attention. I used to enjoy Facebook and Twitter, but now I prefer Instagram the most. Less drama, in my opinion.

  18. Nicole
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    I absolutely love posting pictures about my 10 month old, she is my world and if everyone knew what a strong angel she is they wouldnt judge. Ive made peace with a lot of the negative as I am in control of my feelings. So screw people and what they think. You have a beautiful family thank you for sharing them with us.

  19. Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Hi Jo-anne. Being from the same neighbourhoor as you, I would love to see what your littlr beauties look like, but it’s your decision. Don’t let others make you feel bad for it. You sre standing your ground in protecting your family from SM bullies and that’s a part of what makes you a good mother. Just keep going!

  20. Danelle Hess
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Dear Jo-Ann. Congratulations on the birth of your daughter. What a special time. Enjoy every minute. As a health professional and an educator of future health professionals I too tread lightly when it comes to social media. I find that I often need to explain to students that their decision to post about their patients is not fair to their patients because as you say they ‘didn’t sign up for it’. We don’t always think before we post or comment and the consequences are sometimes dire. If anything I have learnt to be a little more conscious about what I post on social media. Blessings to you and your family.

  21. MARLENE KLAASTE
    Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    We all make choices and people should learn to respect these choices whether they agree or not. Unfortunately some thrive on being nasty and negative, probably coz that’s just who and what they are…..unhappy within themselves. Stick to your decision for as long as you can. You are such àn inspiration and a beautiful soul. #congrats #respect #blessings

  22. Tue, 19 April 2016
    Reply

    Gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous, Jo-Ann! Your personal life is your personal life..and you deserve to have at least that with your family! 100% behind you on that! Congrats on your newest little addition to your beautiful family! Enjoy every minute of cuddles and kisses.. away from social media.

  23. Monica Thaele
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Hi Jo-Anne the mere fact that you are already sharing pictures of your family is already a treat in itself because it’s not a must or a need for us to see but yet so special that you do share them on social media. People have no right to ask for more then what you choose to show, of what belongs to you. I love the way that you do it and it’s a blessing that you so humble about it. Love love love.

  24. Kerrylee
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    i believe that it is a matter of personal choice. I cant even fathom the fact that people you have never met have the nerve to pressure you or anybody else to reveal pics of their families. What is next? Will they then want to determine how your babies should be dressed and how they should be fed? The fact that the public feel like we have a right to the personal of life of others, just because they are in the media is ridiculous. Our jobs are not our lives so why should yours or any other media personality be held to that standard. You go ahead and post as much or as little as you feel and make good use of the block button.

  25. Helen Barnes
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    My personal take on social media … social media websites become legal owners of all uploaded material, even if it is a picture of a child. Furthermore, others can use this information to, for example, create a fake profile.

    Sexual predators, pornographers and prostitution rings are capitalizing on the rising popularity of mobile devices and social media to victimize children.
    So respect each other’s preference to privacy on social media and before, you post another picture of your child online, this is my warning for you. An innocent photo could be used in a way you have probably never imagined.

  26. Pam nel
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Well said Jo-Anne, it must be a tough balancing act between wanting a level or normality for your family but also dealing with fame and celebrity. You do it so well though!

  27. Julia Van Niekerk
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Hi there 🙂 I’m a young university student and I don’t have any kids of my own. However, I’ve done my fair share of babysitting jobs and I absolutely love seeing parents post little mile stones of their precious kids as they grow. However, I think this is only ok if being shared with close family and friends – those who care and matter. Many times I’ve come across social media accounts where parents, whom I don’t know, share a few pictures of their children (only the good ones here and there) and as a complete stranger I felt as if I had insight into their lives. I felt that I would be able to meet them for the first time and feel comfortable to chat about the personal details of their baby, without them telling me. (Obviously I wouldn’t really do this!).

    Modern Mommy, continue to unapologetically raise and nurture your children in this manner. You’re a sought after celebrity and business woman who is all about positive change and influence; a perfect example and legacy for your children.

  28. Jenilee
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Hi Joanne

    Social media is the best tool connecting people across the Globe. It’s a networking tool that contributes to many areas of our daily lives. However, it has also become a platform which people use for negative influence and it does have an effect on everyone else using social media for the right reasons. I totally agree with your choice to not expose your family. You contribute so much positivity to Womenhood and motherhood through the use of Social media. This is proof that if it is use for the right reasons it can make a difference in the world. I enjoy your Instagram post and your modern mommy blog. Keep up with the valuable insights you share with the world and people around you. God Bless 🙂

  29. Gugu
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Hi Joanne,

    There is nothing wrong with social media. i feel that ppl are a problem. Pppl use this platforms to be mean towards each other. we now have cyber bullies ppl and they are making other ppl miserable. its unfortunate that we cant practice the saying ‘if you cant say something nice abt a person rather dont say anything at all’.

  30. Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Joanne xx
    What an interesting read this has been, thank you! We as fans often think that the Celebs don’t pay attention to what goes on their social media. Often I have wondered if ‘you guys’ (the celebs), haven’t just hired someone to take good pictures and post well written captions. Well I guess that is not the case, and I realise that now with you blog post.

    So why do people post negative comments? Although social media is great way to connect, grow and network and market, I do believe it has the ability to bring out the deepest of insecurities too. I think it has provided a platform to break-down people who seem to have it all going- the looks, the style, the family, the money- in order to make that person (who is commenting negatively) feel better about themselves… AND NOT HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE CONSEQUENCES FACE TO FACE. It’s a problem. It’s a short lived feeling of fulfilment, but a becomes a vicious cycle.

    There are people who would LOVE to see your family, including me. I find joy in seeing happy families and gorgeous pictures, but not everyone is like that. The people who love seeing your family will continue to love seeing them, full face or not…. But the insecure, fault-finding people will be looking for ammunition. Enjoy your privacy, it’s the real moments in life which fill the heart with joy, not the likes and comments on Instagram or facebook. There is something special about really being absorbed in the moment without picking up the cell phone to snap it.

    Thank you for the awesome blogging, keep it up!!
    Samantha xoxo

    • Wed, 27 April 2016
      Reply

      Congrats, Samantha, you have won the R500! Please expect a mail from us.
      xx MM

  31. Nazli Jacobs Basardien
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    I completely agree with your article, I feel the exact same way. I am a 24 year old soon to be mom and even though I have always been around social media , when it started out things were not as bad as it is today. I am disgusted at the things I read people comment on certain pics and I’ve noticed that regardless of how perfect the picture might seem there will always be that group of trolls that will have something negative to say. I sadly think that this wont stop for as long as we live in a superficial society so rather protect yourself cause no one else is going to do it for you!

  32. Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Hi Jo, I too have experienced the ugly side of social media and have become more aware of what I post. I have also removed most of my children’s pictures from Instagram and it is a working progress to remove most from Facebook as well. The moment I capture are all cute to me but under a magnifying glass to others so I too try my best to not post or post as little as possible of my kids. You have two beautiful babies, continue to protect them as you see fit.

  33. Deluded
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    I believe we have come too dependent on social media for validation, Why do we need to be on every social medium out there. I have a facebook page and only invite people I know. The world is cruel enough without us going out there and inviting them to be part of my life – these people treat me like I am invisible in the real world. And therefore my facebook is mine to do what I please, available to those I care about and they know me and what they will find on it. I guess being celebrity changes things – but if you want some privacy you should be selective about the social media you join!

  34. Yolanda
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Hi jo u will find ppl dat is jst plain jealous and small minded,into today’s society it’s best 2 keep ur kids safe cause words hve a profound effect on kids’jst luk @ all da kids dat hve been bullied @ school jst because other had da power of words’as much as I wud luv 2 see ur family I respect ur decision by keepin dem out of da public eye

  35. Nerisha Moodley
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    After seeing that beautiful picture on IG, even though I’m ridiculously late for the office, I sat and cuddled my 2 sick babas (8&4) for a bit. The only greenery we had was my couch cushions & their snot :). I’m a mum who posts a lot on social media and throw a lot of pics and stories of them out there. Fortunately so far no-one in my circle has said anything negative where they are concerned. Guess it’s the benefit of not being ‘famous’ and open to many people. Social medias made it too easy for people to comment and critisize each other without thinking. A local celeb posted a pic recently of herself and someone commented ‘what did you do to yourself you look -and inserted a monkey emoji’. As much as I may not know her, I was hurt for her. She’s a woman and mum like me. I know people say if you put yourself out there, then it’s fair game but I don’t accept that. If I see something I don’t understand esp from another woman my new mental motto is ‘not for me but let her be’. Wish more people would ‘filter’ their thoughts before commenting.

  36. nasika baijnath
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    I personally think there is an extent to what you share about yourself and family over social media. why open ourselves to so much unnecessary issues. i feel on facebook, twitter, google, instagram its best not to show too many pics of kids as there are many people with negative attitudes and who are also capable of harmful actions but that is just my opinion, each to their own.

  37. Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Congratulations on your baby girl and the beautiful family you are growing!

    I think social media is good for a lot of things – catching up with old friends, connecting with new people, marketing, CSI and getting the latest news. All except sharing (too much) of your personal life. I used to vent on twitter, with no particular names or reference, about personal issues that upset me. It upset my partner, and I eventually learnt to stop doing that. We were blessed with a baby boy, and I have posted just one picture of him of social media.

    I noticed a while back, browsing through your IG posts, that when you posted pictures of your children, their faces were never visible. All the while, the pictures were incredible. I thought that was a brilliant idea/solution. Sharing what you want to, without sharing too much or exposing your children, whether they will be able to see it or not, to the horrible vices of social media today.

    I think it is also a bit different for public figures. Because they have so many people who are interested in their personal lives as well as their professional, it is always such a big deal when they post personal things. For those who adore them, it is a treat! For the haters, just another opportunity to throw shade and say mean and nasty things for no reason other than you are able to.

    It would be lovely if we lived in a society where people respected one another, and were not as mean and judgmental on social media because we are separated by our devices. Unfortunately we don’t, and because of that I think it is important for us to exercise control as and where we can, and not so much for other people, but just for our own peace and sanity.

  38. Lucille
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    There are some people in this world that sadly thrive on negativity and on making other people feel bad, so even though social media can be used for so many good things it can also be used to put people down, which is awful. I use social media to try and grow my little baking business as well as boast about my kids achievements but there are people that post their entire lives on it or make it seem as though their lives are something it’s not. People are strange at the best of times. Congratulations on the birth of your little girl.

  39. Simonne Stellenboom
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Motherhood. Parenting. Social Media. In my opinion, this is what this post is about in that order of importance. As a mom, you will instinctively know, what feels right and you will post accordingly. Sometimes, something will be so precious and intimate, like your child telling you ‘love you’ for the first time, that you might not want to share and hold sacred that special moment. Sometimes, they make you so proud, whether it be their first step or something funny that you want to shout it from the rooftops and show the whole world! That should all be okay because as a mother, you will learn and grow and get better. Social media can be harsh and hurtful and very intrusive and it is part of the journey. Embrace that you will not always get it right and that not everyone will always agree but also trust in your ability to know what is best for your kids, your motherhood journey and parenting relationship with the only other parent that matters-their dad and then enjoy social media. You can’t control what people say, like or dislike but you can control what you want to post, caption and learn from. Being a 28 year old mom, raising an 8 year old, I too have so much to learn and know that I will have to discern between ugly comments and growing opportunities. You are a fantastic mother! Trust that you will always try your best to protect them on any platform including social media. Love, @miss-monie 😉

  40. Mbali Ntuli
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    The thing about social media is that,it’s bitter sweet,especially for celebrities.It’s a wonderful feeling sharing all your wonderful moments on social networks.However for people in the public eye,every innocent captured moment is scrutinised and dissected and turned into an “ugly form”.But i say keep posting those precious moments.They are wonderful to look at!

  41. Carolynne
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    I think nowadays it is seen as queer when people do not post pics of themselves or their family members on Facebook Or any other social media. Within the Social Media sphere everyone feels they are entitled to your time, pictures and everything else. It still remains a matter of choice and that choice should be respected. Personally I do not post any pictures of myself, my niece and anyone else in my family or friend circle. I have been questioned about this as well and have responded as such.. in this very sick and questionable times we live in today… human trafficking.. child pornography etc.. I am extremely vigilant around what personal pics, check-in statuses I add on Social Media and more specifically Facebook..

  42. Rushana Charles
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    Good Day Jo-Ann
    I totally agree that it is best to keep our children protected from the harshness of the world. I too have two beautiful children and am a hardworking entrepreneur who have had my share of the spotlight and I try to keep my family life separate from my “social media life”.
    However I believe that good prevails over evil and I tend (although its really hard) to give the GOOD in people more power than the bad.
    Life is so magical and we have so much to share about our life journeys that it would be selfish not too 🙂

    So, you keep up with what you are doing and continue to be a blessing to your family, friends and the world!

    Abundant blessings and favor always

    Kind Regards
    Rushana

  43. Candice Kotze
    Wed, 20 April 2016
    Reply

    I really admire you Jo-ann and honestly I think you keeping your family private leaves more to our imagination lol. I always try to picture how gorgeous your babies are just as you are. I also admire the fact that we know this is you and not your PRO. It’s your choice and as a huge fan, I totally respect that. Lots of love and blessings to your family!

  44. Fri, 22 April 2016
    Reply

    Congratulations on your daughter! Yay glad she has arrived safely. I totally respect your decision to run your social media accounts this way. As a business owner who has random people following me and my Instagram account on public, I’ve contemplated this point before, whether I should be posting photos of my son on my page, or keeping him hidden from the world. He was the inspiration behind the idea that created my business and it’s because of him that I’m able to do what I do, and for me it feels like I’m leaving a big part of my story out if I don’t include him in my photos. So far, I haven’t had any negative incidents online, thankfully. I think it’s a personal decision for everyone and you should do whatever feels safe and right for you and your family.

  45. Yumnah Jones
    Fri, 22 April 2016
    Reply

    I often think that social media is 1) a means that certain people want to portray how perfect their lives are but in the meanwhile criticize others and 2) how some people use it as an investigative tool to gather personal information about others (a gossip tool) and (3) people like me, who uses social media (Instagram and Facebook) as a timeline of my life, so when I am fifty I can refer back it and go: Wow!

  46. Olivia
    Tue, 26 April 2016
    Reply

    My post is rather late but I feel that I also have something to say about social media. Congratulations on your baby JoAnn! Even though I do not have children yet, I understand your decision to keep them out of media. You are right, your children and husband did not sign up for the public life, so why should they be subjected to this platform that can be so cruel at times.
    I have noticed that people will comment rude/harsh or nice things, even when they cannot see your children’s faces. I have read several comments on your social media posts of people who say ugly things, though they cannot see your children’s faces. And many other international and local celebs go through similar experiences. It’s your decision and frankly I believe that is the best thing to do, keep your family life private. The less people know about your family life the better. As a public figure that is what one should cherish.

  47. Fri, 29 April 2016
    Reply

    Hi Jo.. Blessings and love on the birth of your new baby girl.. I completely agree with you and I sometimes feel people feel the need to say something horrible.. Comes from a place of jealousy.. Anger..and hate but not because of that person but because of what they dealing with personally . I find that if u have complete inner peace n you are happy with your life. There is absolutely no reason to throw shade on someone else’s light. I look at celebs pics esp yours and it encourages me to be a better mom.. It motivates me to work harder… Thank u for your love and u keep motivating us women to be better n do better esp for our kids. All my love Rowena

  48. Chante Groenewald
    Mon, 02 May 2016
    Reply

    What a blessing it is to become a mom.
    I can’t wait until I become one myself but until then I’ll enjoy celebrating the new moms and their joyous and beautiful babies.
    In life there are 2 very important relationships. The first with yourself and the second with those around you. One simply cannot love others and be truly happy for all they have and achieve in their life, if one is not happy and content with yourself. Having a great relationship with yourself is vital. One needs to know how much value, worth and significance you have, in order to celebrate it and to recognize it in the lives of those around you.
    Social media tends to become a platform to envy instead of celebrating what they have.
    We mostly see only the good on social media.
    The baby who looks adorable while eating (and messing) her banana on mom and dad’s bed, what you won’t see however, is the stuggle to get those sheets clean again, ect.
    The key in life is to treat everyone you meet with compassion. I think we need to apply this on social media as well.
    We need to uplift each other, shower each other with kindness and celebrate each others happiness.
    When one keeps this in mind, I think social media will be a much saver place for generations to come.

  49. Lorraine
    Mon, 02 May 2016
    Reply

    Dear Jo Anne
    Congrats & may the blessings continue to overflow in your life & that of your children’s.
    I think that you are doing a great job by not publicizing your family on social media. I am not public figure and i feel the same. People do not use social media the way it should be used and it’s a circus in my opinion when i read the things people put out there just as a general comment. There are just some things that should remain exactly that “private”.
    If we all lived our lives caring about what other thinks, we truly would be in a nut house. My view on life is do what you can for others without expecting anything in return. Love, respect, care. More than that live life to your hearts content. I think the way you share your pictures are just prefect. It’s actually a privilege for us as the public to have a peek into your private life. We do not get to ask more than you are giving us. As a mother myself, i would do the same.

    Continue to be blessed.

  50. Gail
    Mon, 02 May 2016
    Reply

    Hey Jo-Ann. I totally respect you opinion and i really do want to the same for my kids one day not because im famous but the protection from nasty ppl whom dnt think twice to post their nasty comment. However what does one do or say when family or friends want to post pics of your kids and you’re not ready yet. How do you tell them especially if that is what you as the mother wants.

  51. Jade Rolfe (Blommie)
    Wed, 07 September 2016
    Reply

    Hi Jo-Ann, thank you for sharing this post. I mean nobody needs to “please explain”. In fact for many other negative reasons, there have been many articles surfacing advising parents NOT to share pictures of their kids on social media as it is feared that deviants use these pictures for their own reasons (e.g. people who use random pictures of babies and pretend that the children are their own) and then of course paedophiles, Which is sad because some times sharing a picture of FB with close family and friends is so easy, Anyways, the most recent incident citing your reasons for not sharing pictures is that of Beyonce and Jay-Z’s daughter, Blue Ivy. It was so sad to read the comments from adults who did not hold back and calling her “ugly”. The young child may not be able to see this now, but how would it affect her later. Even the strongest and most confident person can be affected by a single negative comment. It is just sad that we cannot celebrate children for the wonderful delightful brats (affectionatly so) that they are. We were once young and carefree before being put down in so many different ways. We must teach our kids to love and accept so that very few judgements may be passed in the future. Congratulations on your two littlelies … they are precious bundles of love!

  52. Nadia
    Sun, 30 April 2017
    Reply

    Hey there
    Let me start off by saying that I’ve recently started reading modernmommy and I am impressed. I don’t have children but want at least five one day so I find this blog not only entertaining but also as something I can learn a lot from. The only thing I don’t get completely is the fact that you don’t even share one picture of your kids and/or family. If someone should make a nasty comment about your children I doubt you going tell them about it so what does it matter what stupid people (I say stupid because only a stupid person would criticize a child let alone a baby).

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